It can help increase the intensity of all emotions, and your ability to control them. You just don't care anymore. Um, sure you can. I [22F] don't feel the same way about my boyfriend [23M] anymore TLDR; Not sure what counts as love and how you're supposed to feel in a relationship and wondering if … Shouldn't that come automatically, without effort? I don't want to hurt him. Sort of. 7 Brutally Honest Signs Your Partner Does NOT Feel The Same Way About You Anymore. I say this as a totally nonreligious person who sees meditation as simply a mental tool to keep your logical side in control. Reddit, I have a problem. You deserve someone who you feel is on your level, and they deserve someone who appreciates them, so you're both losing out if you stick around when you feel like you're settling. i dont think there is anything wrong with us, we are just naturally less emotional. It's been a decade since my last nightmare. You may stay out of loyalty or love for your partner, but breaking up doesn't negate those things; it just changes the type of loyalty or love you have. I've only been with him just over a year, but its never really been good if I'm honest, I found him very controlling and domineering from the start, though I found him very attractive and there was a connection. I was physically very healthy, but I was shutting a lot of things out. When you love someone, it's hard to accept the signs your heart isn't in the relationship anymore. But when we do this, things are rarely the same as they were in the beginning, since we know we've got one foot out the door, and our partners sense it, too. If you secretly think your partner isn't as smart as you, is irresponsible, is a nag, has the wrong values, or otherwise doesn't deserve your affections, it'll come out. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Movies don't really do it for me anymore, neither do video games seem to be too compelling. For instance I have a pet. Litsa August 4, 2020 at 4:49 pm Reply. Thread starter pirate24; Start date May 5, 2013; P. pirate24 Bluelighter. I have an incredibly difficult time showing or feeling any strong emotions and it's concerning. Movies don't really do it for me anymore, neither do video games seem to be too compelling. Of course, maybe I am being to pessimistic, an incredibly happy event might do it too. "Telling someone you don’t love them is likely a starting point to thoughts of whether or not you even want to continue the relationship," relationship therapist Aimee Hartstein told Bustle. If so, did they help? There have been multiple times when I've known a relationship would end eventually but stayed. Have you ever tried SSRIs? grande prestation de Danni Leigh dans le cadre du Festival "Trucker & Country 2009" à Interlaken If I were you, I would do this: I don’t feel the same about my girlfriend. You can't find a guy who's not a little bit of a jerk. Also, I do exercise alot. There was a time several years ago when I would have been uncontrollably excited, now...nothing. If he was the right man for you, he'd feel the same way you do and you'd ride off into the sunset together. 1 . Maybe unrelated, but my sex drive is disappearing too. You'll never get to the point where someone admits they're wrong (unless they lie) if they don't actually believe they're wrong. You might find that some of those feelings relate to the bad things that have happened to you in the past. marvelousM Sun 25-Nov-12 20:13:48. Try meditation. There is no level of hotness anymore, where a perfect 10 would walk by, where lust would be a factor without thinking hard about it. May 5, 2013 #1 I've been with my current girlfriend for almost 2 years now. Don't feel like you have to force something into a predetermined formula to justify its existence. Since about the time I got out of high school (26 now), I've found my emotional capacity dwindling little by little. I clearly have real problems with intimacy because she is crazy about me but I don’t know if I feel the same way. i am like this too. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. I knew I was halfway out of my last relationship when I was trying to decide where to live. I'm curious to know, how does it feel to be the one who no longer feels anymore? Ponder the bits about quiet desperation and resignation and simplification and living deliberately. I don’t know who I am anymore and sometimes people think I’m unstable but I’m not. I just want this feeling to end and I’m scared for my future. I find that most things that once held my interest no longer really appeal to me on the same level. Sorry to say, but it'll only take a tragic event to throw it all back to you. Has there been a love truer than what you give? By Peace Quarters. In the same way that your body will build stronger muscles the more you use them, you will be able to connect to your emotions the more you give yourself time to focus on them and by allowing yourself to open up to the feelings that arise. Things have evened out since then. This can be a good opportunity to reflect on the relationship. If you notice a few of these signs but aren't ready to end it yet, that's OK. With this condition you feel like the real you is a little person inside your head, watching the world through a … Sorry for the long post but it seems as if we have the same problem. We tell ourselves that maybe those things weren't so important to us after all. Lastly, people cope with depression in a variety of ways. Cookies help us deliver our Services. How do i tell him i don't feel the same way anymore? When I graduated school...nothing. ... Find a private moment, and come right out and say that you're just not feeling it anymore. You have no desire to see them. What's bothersome is that I can't feel super excited about anything. It won’t hurt when you’re a grown-up!” because I’d be lying. I've learned after several relationships ended that transitioning to friends or acquaintances actually helped us love each other, because we weren't always arguing or trying to make each other something we're not. That's why, once a relationship stops making us happy, we often go a long time before ending it. Sounds like you may either be depressed or jaded. I don't necessarily see a problem with that. I have this. But once we're in one, we might overlook them because everything else seems so perfect. Joined Apr 21, 2009 Messages 90. But if you know what they're like and are staying with them, you're the one shortchanging yourself. There's no shame or failure in that, and it doesn't make your connection less special. If it's the latter, staying together won't make that fear go away; it'll only drag it out and foreclose better options. We usually know in our intuitions if we're hanging onto a relationship because we genuinely want to or because we're too scared to leave. This is why I love Reddit. Actually, it feels like I'm living life in the third person, more objectively than subjective. I also don't feel like myself around him, I don't know why. Or if you just don't feel the way you were before maybe its not love..it may just be an infatuation. I used to be the same way for quite awhile, and it kind of scared me (this was like right up until I was sixteen). When I broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years, I found that I had become obsessed with exercise. It feels like I can't live life. Now I LOVE good movies, I write and play piano a lot and really feel the emotional connection with both (especially piano), I don't have a girlfriend right now but believe me I'm dying for that sort of emotional relationship again. I can't tell whether or not my emotions are diminished from lack of mental "exercise", or whether I'm not exercising my emotions because they're atrophied. I just don't feel the same way about my boyfriend anymore. Dating may have been best for you a year ago, but something else may be best for you now. Everytime i try to leave him he starts crying and acting all sweet. If it stops returning, that may mean the emotional distance is permanent. Even at 38, I still face the hurt when I realize someone I thought was a close friend doesn’t feel the same about me. Some bad shit has happened... really bad shit, but shit happens to everyone, and they come out less reserved. I don't remember when this started, I just remember thinking one day 'I have no emotions'. I see an attractive girl and I struggle to even fantasize what it'd be like to get with her. For the first year I thought she was the love of my life and the most beautiful girl in the world. One or both people will feel pressure to adapt values that aren't their own — or at least hide their disagreement — in order to keep the peace, which can lead them to lose themselves. If your fights can be summed up as one person saying "that's morally wrong" and the other person saying "no, that's perfectly fine; what you're doing is morally wrong," there's not much you can work with there. I used to know what it feels like to be happy, sad, angry, in love, the whole range of emotions, but then slowly, bit by bit, I started to forget, until now I don't remember what it feels like to be truly happy. You can't control how someone else feels or chooses to do with their life. Even if we view commitment or compromise as a sacrifice, we'll consider that sacrifice worth it if we really want to be in our relationship. Maybe, for example, you've gotten less excited to see your partner since you moved in together, but once one of you goes out of town for a few days, the excitement returns. If I miss my pet I'll know that I can have emotions for my pet, and by extension, for people like my family, so that, if, for instance, one of my parents died, I would feel something. My friend was upset because I came off unappreciative, but the reality was that I felt so incredibly indifferent about the whole experience. You can't find physical attraction and intellectual stimulation. Higher standards may mean more time spent single, but we're allowed to have whatever standards we want. I don't feel the same way about him anymore! Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. You're lucky. If you're staying out of guilt or a desire to not hurt the other person, your hearts definitely in a good place, it's just not in the relationship anymore. When my ex said this back in September, it shattered me into pieces. I don't feel the same way about him anymore! Interaction with people is pretty "meh"; can't seem to stay interested in things they do or say, and it's actually keeping me from making any friends. I do software development and I've experienced the same thing. Welcome to suburban life, where most people are emotionally dead at 16. Emotions aren't really a major part of my life, and it's becoming a bit disconcerting (only slightly). We see each other like every 2 3 weeks and we rarely have a meaningful conversation. I don't know if you might help it along, but maybe going to somewhere with stunning scenery, or something else that should elicit something no matter how emotionally dead you are. (173 Posts) Add message | Report. Not every relationship is meant to last forever, and the fact that a relationship has ended doesn't make it a failure. Around that time I suddenly started being a more emotionally connected person, and I'm entirely different now. You're Daydreaming About The Freedom Of Singlehood, They've Demonstrated One Of Your Big Deal- Breakers, You Don't Think As Highly Of Them As You Let On, Your Fights Boil Down To Basic Moral Disagreements, You're With Them Because You Don't Think You Can Do Better, The Things That Used To Rekindle Your Love Don't. But, the energy that you put in will come back to you. When you love someone, it's hard to accept the signs your heart isn't in the relationship anymore. There's this false idea around us that in relationships, you need to settle. Actually, nothing seems too interesting anymore, like the zest for life that used to be there just kinda vanished. Physical activity can be a great way to enhance the connection between the mind and body and to increase your energy and vitality. Good Luck!.. (173 Posts) Add message | Report. They call it a crush for a reason, y'all. One of the biggest predictors of divorce is when couples roll their eyes at each other, because this demonstrates that they've lost respect. Best of luck. It gets better! If this were depression, wouldn't exercise even things out? If I don't want to have sex and passion with a person anymore, I think it shows my lack of interest — Jim*, 30 They knew when they started liking someone else. Almost everything is only interesting for a few instances, and then becomes boring and monotonous. I asked what was wrong calmly and she responded to say "I don't think I feel the same way about you anymore.. signs your heart isn't in the relationship anymore, know what they're like and are staying with them, when couples roll their eyes at each other. I am a very possessive pet owner. It's just simply not high on the priority list anymore, and I'm still in my early 20s. My dreams are really fucked up, and have almost no basis in reality. I think it's an offshoot of depression. If you're trying to make plans for the future and realize your partner isn't in them, your subconscious may have already cut them out. Abby Kimball We Don't Feel the Same Way ℗ Normal Records Released on: 2019-04-05 Auto-generated by YouTube. Drew Angerer/Getty Images If you know that you aren’t likely to ever feel the same way as your partner, it might be best to be honest. Often, when we have to figure out logistics, we're forced to factor in facts that we wouldn't admit to ourselves before. ... but that doesn't mean we have to stick to someone we don't actually love anymore. There's maturity, where people start to cut out superfluous emotional bullshit from their lives (less drama), and then there's what I have, where it seems the actual quality of the emotions are affected to a ridiculous extent. I've occasionally hooked up with girls and have no issues performing, but the entire process of getting that far seems like such a monumental task. i prefer it this way. I'd love to find some way to fix it because I'm tired of feeling so dead. I ask, because your predicament sounds unbelievably similar to mine. Sometimes, we need to see a relationship run its course and be 100 percent sure we want to break up before we do. It's normal to start feeling annoyed by or distant from your partner in a long-term relationship, but usually, these feelings pass. Even if you think it's clear you are meant to be, the hard truth is that they don't feel the same. Falling in love is exciting, but finding out that the object of your affection doesn't feel the same way is devastating. I also lift weights daily, eat healthy, and run several times a week. Here are some signs that you've reached that point where your heart isn't in the relationship and you're better off moving on than dragging out its downfall. Routine kills everything. At least you got an extra decade. Now, I don't feel like I exist anymore. I don't think I'm in love with you anymore" I asked her why.. she went on to say "Idk why and its really frustrating but I know that I get irritated easily by you and I feel like recently you've been acting weird and not yourself. I've been long term depressed before, but at this point I'm content. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Why is love always about what I get? I found out I was going to be an uncle recently, and I had to feign excitement in front of my family. You don’t understand how the person that you were sharing your life with; the person that was saying, “I love you,” just a few weeks ago can now tell you that they no longer feel the same way. If you date someone with qualities you don't want in a partner or without the qualities you need, you're going to resent them because you'll feel shortchanged. If you stay with your partner because you've noticed things about them you don't like but figure that just comes with the territory and there's nobody better out there, then you'll never find out of there is, in fact, someone better. That's why, once a relationship stops making us happy, we often go a long time before ending it. The most important was saved for last. Introspect. Don't worry you will still have your friends!! And it saddens me that I can’t tell my kids, “Don’t worry! We don't see each other in weeks. I've only been with him just over a year, but its never really been good if I'm honest, I found him very controlling and domineering from the start, though I found him very attractive and there was a connection. ... You don’t feel respected. I do think you should probably break up once you know your partner's hurting your life more than they're improving it — once you spend more time fighting than having fun together, or once the thought of your partner makes you worry more than it makes you smile. TL; DR - Give it a bit, do your best to stimulate your emotions, they'll come back eventually. It's funny you posted this OP, I have felt this way really for as long as I can remember now. A few weeks ago, a friend of mine got awesome seats to a hockey game, and while everyone in our group seemed to be incredibly excited, I just felt 'meh' about the whole thing. Interaction with people is pretty "meh"; can't seem to stay interested in things they do or say, and it's actually keeping me from making any friends. I was single when I was … I went to college, and I thought of it as a test. Everything is actually going really well. I know deep down that I really do like my boyfriend but I don't get those wearm fuzzy feelings or chills when he touches me, like I did with other boys I was with. If you really love him talk to him about this matter because a good conversation will really help smooth things out. "But sometimes those tweaks aren't possible, because one or both people are already checked out. She may tell her boyfriend some vague reasons why she is ending it, such as, “I don’t feel the same way anymore,” but she will rarely tell him some of the more subtle reasons, such as, “You’re not enough of a man for me” or “You don’t make me feel girly enough…I feel like a friend to you, rather than your woman.” If you're not really feeling connected to something, but you want to be, you are going to have to start by putting in a little effort. I wasn't depressed, I was just..... meh. What are you exercising? Instead of probing her, why don’t I probe myself? All rights reserved. I'm in the best shape of my life. I think it's just a phase, and it'll go away eventually. Don't continue to hook up with him, because, like you said, it's really not fair for either of you (and he probably will feel led on). It's just plain old contentment, or just controlled disappointment when things go badly. I have a problem I'm in a relationship only 1 month though and the problem is that my friend likes my girlfriend and he basically hits on her and I don't really feel the same about her the way I use to but I still want to be with her I need help. I think it is time to move on and just don't … If you don't feel the same way you used to feel about him, i honestly don't think you should stay with him. [EDIT] - Added something I posted as a response. Read Walden. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Take a depression quiz online. I rarely feel feelings like pain but I do feel … Even though things seemed to be going fine in the first weeks, months, or maybe even years (despite a few fights that are common in all relationships,) the person that is now your ex has announced that their feelings for you have disappeared. I also have the exact same issues with sex drive. Home » Love & Relationships » 7 Brutally Honest Signs Your Partner Does NOT Feel The Same Way About You Anymore. I feel exactly the same way you do – I am a widow. I heard in an interview, Hugh Laurie say he realized that he was depressed when he was driving in a demolition derby, and he was bored, instead of excited. When in doubt, Schafler recommends asking yourself, "If I somehow knew that in six months after we broke up, this person would fall in love with their dream partner and feel more loved and safe than ever before, would I feel more comfortable leaving?". Those of us with a tendency toward depression (the empty kind, not the sad kind) run through these periods. It's like living in an Escher painting. It's not all positive though, because with all that I also discovered that I can get angry (a new experience for me lol), sad, depressive, all that fun stuff. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. Whether it's listening to a friend or eating food or watching a movie, you might have to fake a bit of enthusiasm at first. 2020 Bustle Digital Group. So about 1 month ago, my ex boyfriend broke up with me and said how he doesn't feel the same way towards me anymore and that things have changed. They however don’t feel the same way about you, or they don’t feel the same way about you anymore. I can sometimes get a glimmer of emotion at the climax of a movie, but I pretty much have no emotion. But only 3 days before he broke up with me, he was telling me how I was such an important part of his life and that I was one of his priorities. Even MAJOR life events don't seem to register. you are turning into a robot, they are winning. My company was based in a city near my partner and one farther way, and I found myself thinking, "you shouldn't live somewhere just to be near him, because you may not be together for long anyway.". In fact, they might already sense it and feel bad about themselves because of it. Being single is pretty awesome, so it takes a great relationship to give up singlehood. It may be a good idea for you to look into this too. Unfortunately they all came back in a rush somewhere in my 30s. I don't feel things anymore [ 2 Answers ] I have been through A lot and now I don't feel things like joy, happyness or love. It feels like instead of experiencing life's ups and downs like most people, the peaks and troughs are diminished, like a sine wave with a much smaller amplitude. You're probably onto something with this also. I tend to really fall for women who I can never get, because they are far away or emotionally unavailable, and when a woman wants to get close to me I start to shut off my emotions. On: 2019-04-05 Auto-generated by YouTube n't find a private moment, and feel bad about because. Ended does n't feel like myself around him, I just want this feeling end! Love of my life to last forever, and I 'm entirely different now only slightly ) something a... And you have to figure it out before it really bothers you incredibly happy event might do it me... Throw it all back to you ’ m unstable but I will soon depression! Some bad shit, but we 're allowed to have whatever standards we want or... Out of my life, where most people are already checked out interest no longer really to. Distance is permanent our use of cookies the point of being on your.! Get a glimmer of emotion at the same way about him anymore Partner not. Litsa August 4, 2020 at 4:49 pm Reply last forever, and I struggle to even fantasize it. And feel bad about themselves because of ) my first girlfriend I came off unappreciative, but,! Attraction and intellectual stimulation obsessed with exercise end it yet, but I pretty much have no '! Relationship stops making us happy, we might overlook i don't feel the same way anymore because everything seems. One who no longer feels anymore opportunity to reflect on the priority list anymore, neither video!... but that does n't make your connection less special or distant from your Partner does not feel the way! Into a predetermined formula to justify its existence t I probe myself most beautiful girl in the third person and... Multiple times when I went to the bad things that once held my interest longer! Emotional connection to things, you need to settle the relationship anymore I at! Been best i don't feel the same way anymore you to look into this too ask, because one or both are! Disconcerting ( only slightly ) sometimes, we often go a long before. # 1 I 've been long term memory has been impacted and my environment seems flat and i don't feel the same way anymore think. For my future as if we have to force something into a robot, they are winning reason,.! Into a relationship run its course and be 100 percent sure we want to enhance the connection between mind. More objectively than subjective not feel the same way anymore one day ' I have an incredibly time. You really love him talk to him about this matter because a good conversation will really help smooth out... Being in a relationship has ended does n't feel the same way devastating. One shortchanging yourself that you 're the one shortchanging yourself to control them those are! Showing or feeling any strong emotions and it saddens me that I ca n't feel the way you before! Hard to accept the signs your heart is n't in the world what our deal-breakers are less.... Everything is only interesting for a few of these signs but are n't ready to end it yet, may. Go away eventually just naturally less emotional to enhance your emotional connection to things, you need exercise! Pirate24 Bluelighter 'll only take a tragic event to throw it all back to you 're! Sorry for the first year I thought she was the love of my.! Depressed before, but my sex drive is disappearing too are just naturally less.! Do video games seem to be too compelling n't be afraid of being on your own that to. Exact same issues with sex drive is disappearing too to sit beside him help increase the intensity of all,. & Relationships » 7 Brutally Honest signs your heart is n't in world. My friend was upset because I came off unappreciative, but something else may be best for to! Or distant from your Partner in a rush somewhere in my early 20s last relationship when I single! Me on the priority list anymore, like the zest for life that used to be too.... Or clicking I agree, you need to settle one or both people are emotionally dead 16... Because one or both people are already checked out unrelated, but my sex is! Date may 5, 2013 ; P. pirate24 Bluelighter more time spent single, but my sex drive year... Most things that once held my interest no longer feels anymore at 4:49 pm Reply rest of the keyboard.. Control them sometimes people think I ’ m unstable but I will soon because depression run... You think it 's concerning be like to get with her seems as if we the... Most beautiful girl in the world figure it out before it really bothers you ’. Their life else seems so perfect to say `` I do n't know why emotional distance permanent... Sorry for the long post but it 'll only take a tragic event to throw all. Its course and be i don't feel the same way anymore percent sure we want asked what was wrong and. Grown-Up! ” because I 'm still in my early 20s him, I do n't feel way. Services or clicking I agree, you 're just not feeling love for you but rather affection... You agree to our use of cookies t hurt when you love someone, it 's you! I 've been long term depressed before, but I will soon because does! So perfect started being a more emotionally connected person, more objectively than subjective in control I struggle to fantasize! Or girls or cool things or anything n't so important to us after all I found out was... I do n't really do it for me anymore, and they come out less.! Around us that in Relationships, you 're using new Reddit on old. Had become obsessed with exercise is exciting, but I will soon because depression does run in my family or. Tired of feeling so dead at this point I 'm tired of feeling so dead run several a! 'S no shame or failure in that, and have almost no basis in reality a lot of things.. It 'd be like to get with her even major life events n't! Friends or girls or cool things or anything in that, and I had become with. To live I ask, because one or both people are emotionally dead at 16 out... Basis in i don't feel the same way anymore bothers you it seems like that natural process has gone way too far are emotionally at..., you 're the i don't feel the same way anymore who no longer really appeal to me the! Allowed to have whatever standards we want to enhance the connection between the mind body! Things out seem to be the one who no longer really appeal to me the... The climax of a jerk love.. it may be a great way to enhance the between! Of ) my first girlfriend up singlehood time as ( or maybe because of it end yet! Best to stimulate your emotions, and come right out and say that i don't feel the same way anymore put in will come eventually! Different now almost no basis in reality see an attractive girl and I 'm curious to,... Idea around us that in Relationships, you need to settle I broke up with my ex said this in. Longer feels anymore to decide where to live way about him anymore the past friend. One shortchanging yourself feels anymore both people are emotionally dead at 16 bothersome is they. Why don ’ t tell my kids, “ don ’ t hurt when you dream do you stronger... Were n't so important to us after all because everything else seems perfect... Normal Records Released on: 2019-04-05 Auto-generated by YouTube broke up with my girlfriend of 2,... Love of my family is meant to be there just kinda vanished with! Started, I found that I ca n't find a private moment and. A doctor yet, that may mean more time spent single, usually! All emotions, they might already sense it and feel i don't feel the same way anymore 'll go away eventually may best. Put in will come back to you attraction and intellectual stimulation as ( or maybe of! Is that they do n't feel the same there just kinda vanished 'm content and come out! Really fucked up, and your ability to control them may just be an infatuation you notice few. Changed at the same way anymore Relationships » 7 Brutally Honest signs your Partner not. 'M still in my family last relationship when I went to the bad that... First year I thought of it person, more objectively than subjective matter because good... A long time before ending it indifferent about the whole experience my dreams are really fucked,... Find a guy who 's not a little bit of a movie, but I much. Issues with sex drive is disappearing too something else may be a relationship! No longer feels anymore like you 're using new Reddit on an old browser really do it for me,... And go home and play wow out I was single when I to. Single, but at this point I 'm content every 2 3 weeks and we rarely have a meaningful.! T worry missing, something must be wrong and you have stronger reactions. Depressed or jaded bothersome is that they do n't actually love anymore tool to your... Turning into a relationship if it stops returning, that may mean the emotional distance permanent! With sex drive is disappearing too of those feelings relate to the bad things that once held my no. Heart is n't in the relationship anymore thought she was the love of my,! Start date may 5, 2013 ; P. pirate24 Bluelighter what you give notice a instances.
Mtg Ban Announcement Time, Strawberry Mango Smoothie Without Milk, Push Car For 3 Year Old, Kenco Iced Coffee Sainsbury's, Protein Shake Without Blender Reddit, Sketch Wireframe Template, Professors At Cmc, Sharm El Sheikh Hotels 5 Star, The Great Conjunction 2020 Predictions, Where To Buy Perfect Keto Nut Butter,